420 (FINALLY)

SO 4-20 was GREAT. I hung out with The Foxy Foursome allll day.

First, they came over in the morning for some delightful wake-and-bake action. Brownie and I shared a screwdriver cuz we are that hardcore. She also rolled the saddest joint ever (named Lolita) that with our mad skillz we managed to smoke. And in the midst of Lolita, I decided we should pass a bowl around simultaneously.

Then we maxed out on junk food and decided to go DOWNTOWN!

I stopped by one of my favourite hippie stores and got my very own and FIRST PIPE! It is PERFECT for me. It's small and pink (but with a decent-sized bowl) and has little cherries on the side. I named her Jubilee (get it?! Also, ish in honour of the X-Woman) and it was definitely love at first sight.

Then we went to Ian's Pizza where they had free brownies at 4:20. They were okay, but being stoned made them supa delicious. We also ran into some other friends and it was grand.

Then we rented some movies and watched The Doom Generation (which I have seen before and is completely twisted and I LOVE. Snaps, Greg Araki) and smoked more and then The Foxy Foursome dispersed.



Then, at like 1:30 in the morning, Liam and I hung out.

I swear to god it would have been amAzing fun if I had been with anyone else. We got blitzed and broke into Olbrich Gardens to explore. It was completely beautiful in the moonlight, so surreal and quiet. Very Garden Of Eden. And of course it was lost on him. He got all paranoid cuz he's a fucking idiot so we left. Then on the way home, he asked some question (I don't remember exactly what it was) about our strange relationship, and I was completely honest and told him I think he's a huge asshole and I keep trying super hard to be friends and he's a douche cuz he never puts forth any effort. I asked him what his take on the situation is.

He said he didn't have one.

He had absolutely nothing to say for himself. When he dropped me off, he said 'see you later.' I responded 'no, you won't' and slammed the door and walked away, leaving him yelling something about me slamming things.

I know. I keep saying I'm never gonna waste time on him again. BUT THEN I DO. But honest to Christ, that was the last time. I keep thinking if we got a chance to talk, things would be good. But he'll never talk, and he's not worth spending time with. He's not the guy I used to know. Now he's just a big unmotivated, egomaniacal asshole who isn't worth the pixels on this page to write about.

There may be more Liam quips and unsavory interactions between the two of us in the future (at parties and whatnot... I am NEVER going to knowingly hang out with that bag of fuck ever again), but this is officially

The Last Chapter Of Liam In Snarkypants Land.

I Have A Spotty Past With Microwaves

QUESTION: Who just nuked a Rice Krispie Treat for waaay too long?

Answer: Snarkypant's borderline retarded self.

Yeah... the marshmallows basically disintegrated and then caramelized. It was super crunchy.

Yes I ate it hahahaha.


I invented a recipe for fruit salad. It is very easy, healthy. and delicious.

Rainbow Fruit Salad

Add as much of these items as you need for the portion (you can pretty much eat however much you want... as long as you brush your teeth!) you want. They MUST end up being a Roy G. Biv (with purple being representative of both end colours, haha) representation of fruitosity.

Strawberries and/or raspberries
(Red apples are possible but untested)

Clementines and/ or oranges

Bananas

Green grapes and/or kiwi

Blueberries

Purple grapes and/or blackberries

Chop/slice/ peel that deliciousness up and throw it in a bowl

Fruit is always healthy.

Add however much Cool Whip (I prefer extra creamy)
It's only 25 calories a tablespoon.

Mix fruit and Cool Whip while periodically adding as much sugar as you want.
Sugar has like no calories. Just make sure to brush like I said before.

Mix again.

Eat with a spoon

ENJOY!

Hahahaha.

I'm basically retarded.

BUT I WILL ARGUE TO THE DEATH WITH SOMEONE that this could be considered healthy.

Now I'm going to go back to eating mine.

And watching videos on adultswim.com.

I eat that shit up.

Drunky

So I'm definitely still drunk from last night and I just went to Foodsville (the food court type thing across from the cafeteria. Not actually called Foodsville.) to get a smoothie and a tuna sandwich (I'm fucking obsessed with sandwiches. And tuna is bomb.) and I talked to the lunch lady about the weather (we both desperately want it to get warmer) and she basically emptied the blender into my cup. Usually the workers just fill the cup, but lady liked me so I know have a heaping mound of strawberry deliciousness at my disposal.

I love being a people person.